Bunland Exclusive: Sid's Secret Revealed!

So the latest blog in Bunland leads a reader to believe that Jim's third rabbit Sid is a real love! Sweet, tolerant, and good tempered. Fluffy, fuzzy, and warm. Always there to love. Well snap out of it, and take the bunny fuzz out of your brain Jim!

I had the rare opportunity of caring for your little satanistic conquest you call a dwarf rabbit. This rabbit actually growls..yes I said growls. That's not the cutest part though, the best is when he growls as he is knawing your hand or ankle off. I have never experienced animal care to this extent. It was the Omen all over again, just instead of satan being a little boy, he was a pint sized throw pillow known as Sidney the rabbit. I swear this rabbit was once a werewolf and was regenerated as a dwarf bunny on Plum Island!

So what could a good caregiver do? I had a quick saiance, then blessed the apartment, and moved out of town!
                                                

Can a Devil Dog Turn a Good Rabbit Bad???

More problems in Bun Land Folks. The recent crisis was an awful odor eminating from Jim's apartment. Jim keeps the place immaculate so we just didn't understand it. It had been about 4 weeks and he was ready to pack up and move. A clean freak simply cannot tolerate these kind of conditions. As a last ditch effort to help I pulled out the couch, and...holy shit!!  There it was a stack of half eaten, rotten devil dogs with thousands of little bites and cream smears on them. Obviously we cleaned up the mess. Neither thumps or Fran would claim the devil dog fiasco. It was time to take an educated guess. There are two things a devil dog can give you : an erection or a fat ass. well, there was the answer, Thumps was limp and fran's ass fat! So aside from taking away her walbaums and visa card, Jim has her contained in a play area 24/7. I didn't feel bad about it until this letter below came in the mail. What would you do after reading the following:

Dearest human sister almost Kelly:

I don't know how I can live with what I have done. I am the culprit of the devil dog fiasco, yes I Thumper, doer of good....I messed up. If I had to suck down one more fucking bail of hay I would have killed myself. And my salad, so bland, just dark greens, the part most people skip in their salad. I was craving variety, and watching jim molest his devil dog last month just set me off. The way he licked the cream off his nose without flinching, even his farts smelled good after that. So I did it, I used peapod and ordered 12,000 boxes of devil dogs to be delivered. Then I hid them under the couch. This was no easy feet trying to fit all of those devil dogs and fran's fat ass under the same couch. But I did it.

Then I realized I could only eat a half at a time....Problem...I don't like sloppy seconds, so I would just move on to the next devil dog. I mean let's be realistic here, I'm a rabbit, I couldn't just throw the leftovers in the garbage like a human does. So they sat..and..well..here we are.

It's not like Fran is perfect either. You can't imagine how many copies of Cat Fancy she has stolen, and well..used for female things in the past. She really does deserve to be punished. What can I do my almost human sister...Help me!

Yours Truly,
Thumps

Bin Laden's Alternate Hide Out Revealed

Well let's face it, he was a smart cookie. Who would have had enough brass balls to hide out in a military occupied area for five years? Great job on the part of the Pakistani military...a big golf clap to their thorough investigative skills and loyal support of human rights.
It has been reported that his alternate plan was to camp out in the middle of times square, who knows how long it would have taken him to be discovered there. He was planning to dine at the white house, in a shroud of complete white as to meld in with the table cloth for cover. I don't know people, if criminals get any smarter what will we do?